Ever feel like no matter how hard you push, your goals always seem just out of reach? You set a plan, micromanage every detail, and obsess over the outcome—only to feel frustrated when things don’t go your way.
Here’s the truth: The harder you chase, the further your goals run.
The problem isn’t that you’re not working hard enough. The problem is that you’re gripping too tightly to the outcome, and in the process, you’re strangling your own success.
Think of a plastic water bottle. If you gently hold it, it keeps its shape. But if you squeeze it as tightly as possible, what happens? It crumples.
The same thing happens in life. When you try to control everything—the results, the people around you, every small detail—you destroy the very thing you’re working so hard to achieve.
The most successful people don’t force their way to success. They attract it by becoming the kind of person who naturally achieves their goals.
You can’t control everything, but you can control:
✔ Your mindset
✔ Your work ethic
✔ Your discipline
✔ How you respond to challenges
Rather than obsessing over the end result, fall in love with the process.
A client of mine has been doing Judo for nearly a decade. His goal? Become a black belt. He trained hard, competed, and made progress—until an unexpected knee injury took him out right before a key tournament.
He was frustrated, feeling like his goal was slipping away. But when I asked him:
👉 “Are you doing Judo because you love it, or just to get the black belt?”
It hit him. He was so focused on the result that he had lost touch with the reason he started. The injury was a blessing in disguise—a chance to reset, find his passion again, and return even stronger.
The same principle applies to relationships, careers, fitness—everything. When you chase something too hard, you risk smothering it:
🔥 You cling to a person out of fear of losing them, and they pull away.
🔥 You desperately grind toward a goal, and the stress burns you out before you even get there.
🔥 You push for a promotion at work, but in your eagerness, you overlook the skills and mindset needed to actually earn it.
Instead of asking, “What do I need to do to get what I want?”—start asking:
👉 “Who do I need to become to have this naturally?”
Your goals aren’t just about the title, the money, or the status. The real prize is the person you become in the process.
Think back to the last promotion or pay raise you got. The excitement of the achievement faded quickly, didn’t it? But the skills, discipline, and growth you gained along the way? Those stayed with you.
The same applies to every area of your life.
There’s a poem that perfectly captures why we need to trust the process:
📌 I asked for strength, and God gave me difficulties to make me strong.
📌 I asked for wisdom, and God gave me problems to solve.
📌 I asked for courage, and God gave me dangers to overcome.
📌 I asked for love, and God gave me troubled people to help.
💡 My prayers were answered.
You may think you’re ready for success, but the truth is—if you were truly ready, you’d already have it.
The challenges, the struggles, the setbacks? They’re shaping you into the man who can actually handle success when it arrives.
🚨 If you’re always chasing but never catching what you want, this is why.
Stop gripping so tightly. Stop forcing. Instead:
✔ Focus on who you’re becoming.
✔ Commit to the process.
✔ Trust that when you’re ready, the right things will come.
🎥 Watch the full breakdown in today’s video:
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